Retroguy's Wonderland

As you've no doubt already heard, today is the end of the world so if you have any unfinished business to attend to, get moving and get er' done. One thing's for sure, it's not like we didn't have any warnings about the inevitable coming of the apocalypse. Signs were everywhere. Still not convinced ? If you were an almighty power and gave your creation free will to take all the beauty you've given them to go forth and enhance life on earth and harness the wonders all around you and the best we come up with is this: Wouldn't you cash in the chips and move on to something else too? Still not convinced ? How about this: Granted - he is amusing but holy cow, where the hell do we go from here ?!?! So again, the end is literally around the corner so here's a list of things to do (or not to do) in lieu of the coming destruction. 1. Don't pay any debt. (Why bother?) 2. Run with scissors. (What's the worst that can happen, you're gonna d...

Sad news today from the world of professional "real" wrestling. Randy "Macho Man" Savage died tragically after suffering a heart attack while driving his SUV in Tampa, Florida. His wife, who was in the car with him, only suffered minor injuries. Randall Mario Poffo held twenty championship titles during his professional career and along with Hulk Hogan was one of the primary drivers behind the success of the WWF and bringing professional wrestling to the mainstream. He brought a unique style to the ring along with his raspy voice and trademark "Ohhhh yeaaah" and took full advantage of the marketing machine that was the WWF (now the WWE) and became one of their biggest stars. In typical wrestling form, he shifted side many times during his career going from bad guy to good guy making and breaking various alliances along the way and was "managed" for most of his career by his wife Elizabeth Ann "Miss Elizabeth" Hulette who died of a...

Time and time again there is evidence that nothing is new. It's all been done before. Everything is a remix. There are very rarely new and original ideas. Need more proof ? Check out the picture below of the recent Royal wedding of Will and Kate and the other classic Royal wedding in Cinderella which was a Disney movie from 1950. Honestly, you'd think the British Royal family could come up with an original thought !!

I was shocked to find out that the picture floating around of the U.S. President in the situation room watching the events unfold in Abbottabad were doctored. They lied damn it !! Unbelievable. However - the truth can not be suppressed. Here now is the un-retouched, original photo of the situation room on that fateful, historic night with the President and his staff. This explains a lot. Un-edited actual image of the White House situation room May 1, 2011

I came across the original trailer for the now classic Friday the 13th. By today's standards, there isn't enough creepiness in the trailer to make anyone want to go see it. Honestly I've seen scarier scenes in Toy Story or an episode of the Wiggles. That Jeff dude on the Wiggles gives me the willies. Seriously, don't wake him. 

Back when the world of personal computing was young, Commodore computers pretty much were the ones to beat. The company offered a pretty compelling argument, if you're going to spend money on a gaming platform, why not spend it on an actual computer that played awesome (for the time) video games instead.  With the success of the company's entry level personal computer, the VIC 20, Commodore released their next generation platform the C64 in 1982. This 8-bit wonder machine offered an unheard of 64K standard memory, standard audio and video that was better than IBM and Apple's offerings, all for a mere $595 which was far less expensive than anything comparable. It game with a built in RF modulator which allowed you to connect it to a TV and came built in with the Basic programming language on startup. Nothing could come close to that at the time.   Commodore Data Cassette The machine's success came in part from Commodore's decision to offer it through regular r...

If you happen to have forgotten mother's day, which is is today, don't be surprised if the looks your getting from mama look something like this. And rightly so. After all, regardless of what you think of your mother, remember one thing - she grew a human being inside her body. Let me say that again - she grew a human being (or possibly a few) in her body. For that alone you have to respect her. She sacrificed her body, time and energy and smothered you with unconditional love to make you the person you are today and you couldn't take the time to drop by a Hallmark store? Mr T pities the fool that doesn't respect his mom.  I'm still lucky to have my mom in my life and it amazes me that even at her age she seems to have more energy than I do and still manages to keep smiling even with all the aches and pain that come with getting older. What's the secret ? How does she do it ? Many have entertained the Supermom theory and that would certainly explain a lot...

Yup I went there. What can I say, I'm a fan / geek. Here are a couple of commercials featuring the lighter side of the dark side.

Today's news about the elimination of America's public enemy number one brings to mind another day that I will never forget, September 11, 2001. As you know, on that day the world changed and most likely will never be the same.  On that day I found myself in Chicago, Illinois. The previous day was my travel day so even to this day I wonder what could have happened had I made arrangements to fly on the Monday morning rather then the Sunday afternoon. I was in training with a group of Americans from all over the United States. I was the only Canadian there. When we heard of the first plane hitting the first tower, we all went to a common room with a television and together saw the second plane hit and the collapse of the two towers along with the attack on the Pentagon and of course the other downed plane that through the courage of some brave souls prevented the unnecessary death of more innocent people. Obviously we were stunned into silence. I remember a helpless feeling w...

In less than twelve hours, Prince William takes his bride Catherine Middleton and walk her down the aisle of history. I wish Will & Kate many things - first of all happiness and healthy children. Secondly, exactly the opposite of what William's parents had - a loveless marriage, and finally I wish them peace and serenity. That will be a tough one.  When William's mother Lady Diana Spencer was introduced to the world, it spawned a new industry featuring unscrupulous photographers who did whatever they could to get a money shot of Diana during every facet of her life. Although the paparazzi existed before Diana was around, it was her emergence that took the scummy profession to a whole new low. She wasn't able to lead any sort of normal life and raising her children was impossible without the ever probing lenses of the air breathing pinheads that were ultimately responsible for her untimely death. Make no mistake, the paparazzi and our insatiable thirst for celebrit...

Star Wars pretty much changed everything when it came out back in 1977. It changed how we made movies, how we marketed movies, how we watched movies, and what we expected from movies. It pushed the envelope of movie making magic and brought many new technologies that are still used today including blue screen filming techniques and the THX recording standard. Worldwide, all the Star Wars movies have generated over $4.4 billion dollars in revenue. The movie spawned many rumors and unbelievable stories that would be hard to imagine today. For example, Kenner Toys signed on during production of the film to handle toy merchandising but thought the movie would flop so produced pretty much nothing and was unprepared for the huge demand after the success of the movie. For the Christmas rush, they sold boxes with coupons or basically toy I.O.Us and couldn't fulfill orders until March. George Lucas was smart enough to retain 40% of the merchandising profits. Originally Han Solo was suppo...

So the long weekend was great but as usual Monday came way too fast and was way to tough to bare. Hence the video of the day for a dreary, rainy Monday is a classic by Happy Mondays, "Step On". It was either that or "I Don't Like Mondays" but that would have been waaaay to obvious a selection. Happy Mondays formed in Salford, greater Manchester in 1980 and were a struggling band until being discovered at a battle of the bands at the legendary Hacienda nightclub. They evolved and worked with various producers and in time became a staple on the rave scene. "Step On" was released in 1990 off their Pills n' Thrills and Bellyaches album and reached number 5 on the UK charts and number 9 on the U.S. modern rock charts. It cheered me up - hope it does the same for you . 

There is no logo in the world that is more recognizable than the Coca Cola company's flagship product. Coke and its classic bottle design are a symbol known all over the world. It's gotten to the point you don't even need to have the word Coke in an advertisement as long as the distinctive bottle shape is there somewhere in the image. The classic shape has evolved over the last hundred years and has gone from a rather boring square shaped bottle to the curvy silhouette it now maintains. Below is a timeline picture showing the changes over the years . The shape is also responsible for designers of other products to be inspired by the sexy elements of the bottle, most notably  car designers. there are many examples but one of the best is the 1968 Corvette. The evolution of the bottle continues with many commemorative issues produced for various promotions but one of the latest trends was the availability of metal bottles as well.  There is no doubt the bottle will...

There's actually not as many music videos featuring fuzzy bunnies as you may think. Fear not though, here's a few that will either bring back memories, or fill you with incredible indifference. There's also a classic clip from Monty Python featuring a fuzzy bunny of the lethal kind.  For all my followers of the Catholic persuasion - Happy Easter !

It seems most TV dramas these days are either legal or medical dramas. Regardless of whether it's a gritty, hard hitting drama or a cerebral enigma that unravels itself over an hour, one thing is consistent. Sexy people. Now I'm not saying that there weren't beautiful people on TV back in the day - after all it was called the boob tube for a reason however it seems that casting directors didn't have to worry about eye appeal when choosing actors for their TV dramas. Here's a few examples:  Barnaby Jones (1973)  - First of all, who the heck names their kid Barnaby? Your just begging for a school yard beating with a label like that. Uncle Jed Clampett, a.k.a Buddy Epsen (who the heck names their kid buddy either !?!?) was the title character in this show about a retired detective and his daughter-in-law solving crimes while searching for his son's murderer. Just look at those bedroom eyes. Damn son...... turn it down a notch, it's gettin' hot in here. ...

In a previous post we covered ads from a simpler time that were some of the most sexist we've seen. (Click here to see that post) Let's take a look at a few more ads that were not so much sexist but just kinda dumb.   This ad was pretty hopeful. Some day ALL beer cans will open as easy as the new Schlitz soft aluminum cans. The old cans needed a can opener to get to the amber nectar within but the new cans can be easily opened simply with...... a can opener. Progress baby......progress.  No different than now, back in the 40s people would look to medical professionals for advice on how be the best they could be. Since more doctors preferred Camels, naturally the smart thing for a smoker to do was to switch to Camels as well. You'd have to be a complete idiot to smoke a brand not endorsed by a dapper doctor who smokes in his office. Been a long time since we've seen an ashtray in an examination room.  While we're on the subject of smoking, this ad also offere...

In part 1 of this series, we looked at some examples of candies that you may have grew up with in the 70s and 80s that hold a sweet memory in your mind of carefree and happier times when getting a sugar high after school was paramount on your things to do list. The reality is some of these treats were actually kind of disgusting but it took years of maturing before coming to that conclusion. Not all of it was that bad though. Here's a look at some more of our favorite sugar fix delivery systems.  Candy Necklaces - Candy that allowed for sharing was always fun. These candy bracelets and necklaces allowed you to share with your nearest and dearest friends and make you the most popular kid in the schoolyard. Your friends would line up for a chance to chew off a sweet morsel off the string hanging around your neck. The wouldn't even mind or care that the string of candy has been hanging around your neck all day on a hot and humid summer day while you played soccer. Yummy .   ...

Regardless of your religious background, if you're a kid, Easter always means chocolate and lots of it. Growing up you didn't care what the brand was, whether it was pure milk chocolate or chock pull of palm oil, imitation mockolate. Whether is was in the shape of an egg, a bunny, a train or your favorite cartoon character, all you cared about was that it was chocolate.  Then along came Kinder Surprise eggs. A perfect marriage of dark and white chocolate and a very cool surprise in each egg. They were certainly a treat and caught on pretty quick despite their disturbing ad that was most certainly conceived while under the influence of really bad chocolate or after questionable chocolate brownies. 

"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage....... Cans Of Piss !!! Oh - I mean R.E.M."  Or, "Put your hands together for Van Halen formerly Rat Salad !!! Seriously. I'm not making that up.  Its clear that musicians could be genius at crafting a melody and creating a lasting epic track that stands the test of time yet still really blow at naming their bands. Here's a few more examples : Feedback The Detours Johnny & the Moondogs The Rattlesnakes To see more famous groups and their original names before they snapped out of it and focused to come up with a good name, click here .